Southernlace My Journey Mundane Chaotic N Blessed

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Starting Again........

Once again I am going to try to start a blog and stick to it. I've been writing most of my life but never have I been able to blog with consistancy. Here's to one more try  I've been dealing with a pretty severe bout of depression in the last few weeks and it's really wearing me down and giving me all those thoughts that depression brings when it hits hard. Ya know, the negative self talk that makes you feel worthless and hopeless and trapped. Sometimes, I am able to rise above it and say " thats just depression talking" but other times it feels like there's no hope for me when it comes to being happy and healthy in mind, body and soul.
One thing I have learned over the 20 years I've delt with depression , it does eventually start to receed a bit and light will come through the cracks again and shine a bit of comfort and hope on me.Maybe not very fast. Not very effective at first. But that little glimps causes me to strain and try with all my might to catch just the edge of that sunlight and pull it towards me so I can once again feel alive and feel more than just pain and sadness. I'm waiting on the light to show up right now and hoping that i can catch the edge of the ray and once again walk in the land of the not so depressed for a while longer before it hits again.

1 comment:

  1. There is an ebb and flow that comes with living with depression. You are right. I am so sad to learn of your recent loss. It must be so difficult to move through all the different kinds of feelings and thoughts for you and your family.

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